Thursday, June 26, 2008

My kiNdergarten loVe stoRy



I made some "silly" face and "silly" movement which was more like a clown dance. Her grandfather laughed, but she only smiled with some fear in her eyes then she run away to hold her grandfather hands. She didn't trust that I can be so close to her. She was little frightened from this "clown" in his white coat who just came from the outpatient clinic with his red cheeks, uncombed hair, white small papers fills his pocket and show themselves in an irregular way and sweat drops in his forehead.

When her grandfather took her away I kept looking at them as they were leaving. His legs are so long. He was walking at ease while she was running. I kept looking at them till he finally stopped and hold her up into his arms and started walking faster. I went inside, I locked the door, took a white paper and wrote this piece about what can I remember of her, that lady I loved when we were both 4 years old in the same kindergarten.



I loved her like I loved the ice cream
Her image walked with my nights like a moon
When she wore that white dress
I imagined her as my bride

I wore a mask of a silly child
And proposed that game of acting
I took a role of a clown
She was the princess
In her father’s castle

I approached her and said: I love you….
Her companions laughed
I smiled
She furrowed her little brows
“You clown, how dare you,
Do you want me to tell my father about you?”

I felt so sad, so small
An idea jumped in my mind
I said with a wide smile in my lips
And tears in my eyes
“I can do some funny acrobatics”

She did not answer
Her fellows applauded
I run as fast as I can
I felt myself a jaguar
I was sure all were impressed
I jumped high like a bird
All opened their mouths wide
I flipped
I fell
They all laughed
Her cheeks turned into red
I thought it was for me when she shouted
“Here he comes”

The prince came
He was clean and neat
He was confident
The party continued while I was forgotten

The teacher came with all her pride
She brought us a cake with a delicious aroma
They all ate
I didn’t
“Don’t you like my cake?”
“I’m not hungry”
“Don’t you like its aroma?”
“I like her smell more”
“Who?”
“The princessssss”

“He just said he likes your smell”
She looked at me and shouted:
“You’d better smell your ass”
A wave of laughter made me drown in my tears

She took a blind stone and hit me in chest
I walked as confident as a king and said
“This party was for you”…

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nice blog
I know this comment has nothing to do with your post but i was gonna send you an e-mail but couldn't find an address? i just had some brief questions about anxiety/depression and i realize that this blog or its owner is not offering answers that have to do with these subjects..but i thought it could be worth asking.

Iraqi

tracy said...

Oh, Sami, what a sad, sad, beautifully written memory...i loved it.
thank you so much,
tracy

saminkie said...

Dear Iraqi you are welcomed to contact me on samialbedri@hotmail.com.

Tracy, thank you for your encouragement. You reminded me now of doing some tea... thank you.